Borrowed Subjects

 

Look Bro, a haunted house!

Haunted? By what?

By the ghosts of illusion.

Ghosts of illusion? Aren't ghosts an illusion in themselves? What do you mean by ghosts of illusion?

I mean something that isn't real, but still has left a lingering impact. Ghosts of illusion dude!

If it isn't real, how did it leave an impact? Is it possible it was real, but you just didn't know it? I didn't know you used such heavy duty language. Always thought you were a simple buffoon.

Ha! I fooled you then. See my friend, it left an impact if I thought it was real. Maybe it wasn't. Let me break it down for you. Let's start with ghosts. A ghost means residual energy, right? Like there's no concrete body or physical form, but there's something, correct?

Yes. Or in new age lingo, ghost also means to promise someone you will meet them, but then you don't. Like you disappear into thin air, ghost them. Like those boys on Tinder after two dates.

Aha! That way. True true. That is also a usage. But that's not what real ghosts do. They in fact, don't leave you alone. They haunt you and harass you. So contradictory this English language is. Ghosts hound you, but when you ghost someone, you leave them the fuck alone.

Okay. I'm lost in this discussion. What are you getting at?

So, a ghost has no form alright. Now look at the word illusion. What does it mean?

To believe there is something when there isn't really anything. Like a magician's sword trick. He created the illusion that he cut the lady in half.

But did he cut the lady in half?

Who?

The magician?

No. He created the illusion of it. He made us believe he did, but secretly he was canoodling with her behind the curtain.

Stick to the point here for God's sake. So is an illusion real?

No. But it appears real. That's why it's an illusion.

Okay. Now bro, this is where it gets complicated. A ghost isn't there, but people have seen them. They are the unseen X of this equation. Are they real? No one knows. It is an unknown variable. Only the one who has encountered a ghost will know. So let's say Person A has seen a ghost. So for Person A, we will add X. Now an illusion is the Y of this equation.  Person A thinks they saw a ghost but shrug it aside thinking it was their imagination, or in other words, an illusion. Both are unknowns as it is in mathematics. Now what happens when we add X+Y?

If we are adding words in English, we get ghosts of illusion. Though I still don't know what it means.

If we add X+Y, we get 0.

How?

Because Person A has negated the whole equation by calling their entire theory into question. So the equation falls flat on its face.

Huh? That's it? What an anti climax!

Not yet. There's more.

What?

If we substitute Person A with Person B, everything changes.

How so?

Person B has decided to multiply X with Y. So the number of ghosts have increased, as have the number of times they have been rejected or negated. In other words the ghosts have been ghosted. So now the final outcome is?

I have no freaking idea why I'm indulging in this ridiculous hypothesis that's massacred both English and Maths.

Do you want the answer or not buddy?

It's not like you're letting me go till you tell me!

Okay, the answer is undefined.

What rubbish!

But they were unknown values remember? So you can't multiply them to get any tangible answer. It's like multiplying infinity with zero.

Aiyoo. You have really given me a headache now.

Ha ha. But someday you will understand my equation. And you will say, what a genius you were my friend. Now should we go to the haunted house?

Who lives there, Person A or B?

Maybe both. Maybe no one. Who knows?

Maybe their ghosts?

Maybe we think there are ghosts there but we are wrong.

Maybe we are the ghosts not them.

In any case, let's enter at our own risk and get the answers.

Yeah, maybe it's not even haunted. Just an illusion.

Let's go have a quarter. I've lost all my high thanks to you.

Yeah, let's go get drunk.