Gentle Push

 "Dhruv is coming down for a day. Do you think we should plan a get together? "

Kanika's face grew pale. Her heart skipped a beat but she drew a blank face. 

"No. What do I care? He's a jerk. "

"What really happened between you guys? You were such good friends. "

"Friends? We were never friends. I never knew him at all. He left without even saying goodbye. "

"So maybe this is a good time to sort your stuff out. Ask him. "

"Ask him what? "

"Why he left like that. Maybe there's something you don't know. Maybe he had a reason. "

"Whatever his reason was, that's not how you treat people. It's cold and manipulative. "

"But Kans, he's been going through a tough time lately. The new job hasn't exactly been a breeze. And he misses home. In fact, he told me he regrets making that move. "

"I don't care. Did he for once ask about me? "

"Not really. "

"Did he say, you know, I would like to meet Kanika and explain things to her?"

"No, he didn't. "

"Then fuck him. Do you know how badly I was hurt when he left like that? Am I so pathetic that he did not have the decency to say goodbye? "

"No Kans. You are not. Actually, you are right. You need not bother about him. "

"The only way I will ever meet him again in this life is when he sends me a message or calls me himself and says, I want to talk to you. I'm sorry I left you without giving you any explanations. I'm sorry I was a jerk and never reciprocated your kindness. "

"I very much doubt that's ever going to happen. You know how he is. Non confrontational. Textbook avoidant personality. "

"What's that? "

"Read up on it. They avoid situations and people because they are scared of getting hurt. Scared of people getting attached to them. "

"Why? "

"Because they think they are not good enough. That they could never live up to another person's expectations. "

"It's so sad. I always found him to be special. It's a pity he doesn't see himself that way. How long will he keep running away like this? "

"I suppose till the day he realises that he is worthy of genuine human connection. And that not everyone is out to hurt him. He's not a bad guy, just needs a gentle push."

"You are his friend. Has he never opened up to you? "

"He has. But it took him a long time to. He has been through hurt. But who hasn't? You have, I have. But we have learnt to trust again. "

Kanika covered her face with her hands. 

"What happened? Are you crying? Please dont cry. "

"I really liked him. More than anyone I've ever met. I really liked him. "

"I know, I know. But you can't fix people. It's not your job. Your job is to keep yourself from getting hurt again and again. "

"I can't bear to look at him again. I will break down if I do. Do you know, last night I dreamt of him after a long time. He reached out and held my hand. I woke up smiling today. I thought maybe things would change. And then you told me he's coming. How strange is that? "

"Did he say anything in the dream? "

"He said, you have to learn to trust me. But how can I? He's broken my trust. "

"It's okay. Just forget about it. "

"When is he coming? "

"Friday morning. We plan to meet up on Friday night. "

"I'm going to go out with my friends then. So I don't have to think about him being around. It will take a lot of strength to not want to see him. But I will have to do it to protect myself. "

"Just one second. He's just messaged me. "

"What is he saying? "

"Finalising plans for Friday. "

"Okay. Screw him. "

"Wait. He's asking about you. "

"What is he asking? "

"If you are coming as well. "

"What are you going to say? "

"I said, no, you never said you wanted to meet Kanika. "

"Now? "

"He's not replying. Wait. He says he dreamt of you last night. That you were angry with him."

"I've really had it with this guy now. Why can't he be straightforward with me? "

"I told you. That's how he is. "

"Ohhh."

"What? "

"He's messaged me now. "

"What is he saying? "

"He's asking if we could all meet on Friday night."

"What are you going to say? "

"I don't know. I'm so confused. "

"Tell him you will only meet him if you guys can meet alone. "

"Yes, you are right. That's what I will do. "

"What is he saying now? "

"He says, okay. He would like to meet me alone. "

"When? "

"He's saying Thursday night! "

"That's weird. I thought he was coming on Friday."

"He's saying he's already here. "

"Where? "

"Downstairs."

"Kans. I'm not going to say anything to him. Go, go down and meet him. "

"Now? "

"Yes now! "

"But what if it's not the right time?"

"There is no right time. This is what you wanted, now go! "

"Okay. You are right. I'm going to tell him exactly how he made me feel like shit and how much he means to me."

"Go hug him tight. He's an idiot. He won't make the first move. You will have to do it. "

Kanika put on her flip flops and ran down the stairs. 

"Yeah. She's coming. Yeah, no, wasn't that difficult. She just needed a gentle push. Please don't screw this up. She trusts you. Don't break her heart this time. Otherwise, I'll break your balls, bugger! "

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