The Cave (2)

He took a deep breath and attempted to stand up. He stumbled on the wet rocks, but slowly reclaimed his balance. It had been ten months inside this cave. It no longer scared him anymore. His eyes had grown accustomed to the darkness and his body had learnt to survive on the light emitted by the crystals in the stalactites that hung from the roof of the cave. 

The yellow-eyed demons that used to provoke him, calling him deprecating names and showering him with abuses had disappeared. In his time here, he had realised that they were not real. They looked real because he had allowed them to feed off on his negative thoughts. 

Every time he lost his temper or believed that he has not deserving of happiness, they hovered around his head to take advantage of his weaknesses. He could see their red tongues sucking out the goodness from his soul. But time had taught him how to block them out. Their acerbic words meant nothing to him. 

He remembered her words before she left. She had told him to never doubt her love. There were days when he did. After all, if she really loved him, would she let him suffer like this? But then, she had suffered too, much before him and for much longer. If she could manage to get out of here, so would he. He had to prove to her that he was as strong as she believed him to be. Only then would he deem himself worthy of her unconditional love. 

He could not see his back, but the wings had grown bigger to cover half of his body. He touched them with his hand. They were soft and yet strong, like evergreen branches of a tree. He flapped them and they sounded like the wind on a cold, full moon night. 

Taking one last look at the cave, he walked towards the exit. How was he going to find her now? What if all her promises were lies? What if she had already forgotten about him? In his sleep, he could hear her, calling his name. At times, he felt her warm body next to his cold, bare chest, as she hid her face in his chest and whispered to him how she had fallen in love with him the first time she saw him in the forest. 

The sunlight hurt his eyes as he stepped out, but he held a hand over his forehead and walked outside. The air smelt sweet, crisp notes of heather and cypress trees, wet grass and morning dew. His heart felt overwhelmed with the splendour of the world. How is it that he never realised this before? The man he was before he stepped into the cave was broken, cold hearted and closed up. All he thought then was about how people would use him or hurt him. There was no one he could trust. But that was then. He was not afraid of anything anymore. When you come face to to face with the ugliest parts of yourself in the darkest nights of your soul, you learn to accept everything about yourself. 

But one thing was missing in all this beauty. Where was she? If she could sense him completely, how is it that she did not know he was ready for her? 

He looked around in the woods, but there was no sign of her. Before his mind began to play tricks on him, he stopped its narrative. He trusted her just as she trusted him. There was nothing left to doubt anymore. Now that she had become a part of him, there was no question of being deserted or betrayed. She was him, just as he was her. There were tied together inexplicably in the most delicate way. No matter what he did, he could never cut cords with her. Because it would be like denying himself. He smiled, holding his head high. 

He had grown taller in the cave. Maybe the wings needed him to. Flapping them gently, he slowly lifted off the ground. It took him some time to understand how they worked. They were connected to his mind. If his mind trusted them, they soared. When he thought of falling, he began descending. So this is why being in the cave was important. It all made sense now. 

He hummed an old tune as he soared higher above the trees. The sound of the wind grew louder as he sensed a breeze above him. There she was, flapping her wings, smiling at him. His heart leaped out of joy. She had kept her promise. He moved closer to her and touched her wing with his hand, signalling her to descend. 

When they stood facing each other near the tree, he looked into her eyes and found every cell of his existence exploding with anticipation. For a few minutes, he was tongue-tied and could not say anything. Such was the effect she had on him. But it was his time to prove to her that he had always been worthy of her. 

Pulling her towards him, he embraced her first, then kissed her deeply. It was more magical than how he had imagined it to be. Their bodies tingled merely in the presence of each other. The first touch had melted all of the doubts and questions they had ever had. They were meant to be together. They always had. It just needed to be at the right time. 

Looking at her eyes, he spoke softly, "Thank you for never giving up on me".

She kept her head on his shoulder and hid her face. 

"Thank you for not doubting my love. "

He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. He had made it. He was home.